SIMPSONVILLE, USA

Further flogging from our recent post about Springfield's attempt to land the premiere of "The Simpsons Movie," scheduled to open in July:

•Fox was caught by surprise when the story about the contest broke last week. Sources say contest rules are still being ironed out, so it's unclear what we need to do to win the damned thing.

•Tony Messenger, editorial page editor of the News-Leader, is equally hyped about landing the premiere, and he's all about steering clear of "official" efforts:

My guess is that city and CVB officials will use their considerable powers to put together a very high quality video presentation selling our city. I don't think that's the way to do it. It's not in the spirit of the Simpsons. I suggest some bright college students or perhaps computer literate high school dropouts put together a more YouTube like presentation that does more poking fun at our city (with love, of course) than it does praising our city's positive aspects.

Amen and amen, Two Fingers. Though we are a little concerned about one of Messenger's suggestions linking locals to cartoon characters:

A dead body in Lake Springfield? Homer would love that. John Twitty as Mr. Burns? (Sorry, John). John Q. Hammons (and his statue) as Jebediah Springfield? Classic. And, my personal favorite, Vincent David Jericho as Ned Flanders.

An insult to Ned Flanders, and far too vital a character to be aligned with a pathological complainer. The radio personality is more like Louis "Mr. Teeny" Toot, trained monkey to Krusty the Clown. He's an immigrant, after all.

Or better still, VD(j) is Birch Barlow, a right-wing radio host and author of the book "Only Turkeys Have Left Wings." He's pudgy, pompous and unimportant. Sounds like a perfect fit.