The Oakland Tribune offers a Thanksgiving Eve story guaranteed to make the boys crawl home.
Tu Jin-Sheng has the nickname "Iron Crotch." This week he lashed his penis to a moving truck and pulled it across a parking lot.
From the story:
In lace-up leather boots and a black tank top, the 50-year-old tied a strip of blue fabric around the base of his penis and testicles and tugged to make sure it was on tight. An assistant kicked him hard between the legs before he lashed himself to the vehicle.
He groaned, grunted and pressed against two men for resistance.
Then, slowly, the truck began to roll forward.
About 20 people, most of whom study Qigong, the ancient Chinese art of movement and breathing to increase energy, gathered for the truck pull in an unassuming office park just off Interstate 880.
A documentary film director and producer from London were on hand to shoot the jaw-dropping feat for a three-part series called "Penis Envy," scheduled to air next year on Channel 4 in the United Kingdom. Footage from the truck pull will be used for the series' piece on building the perfect penis.
"He's very special. Powerful. Superman," said an awe-struck Shawnee Wang, who studies Qigong with Jin-Sheng at his gym in Cupertino. "I just came here to watch my master perform" ...
Jin-Sheng's performance Tuesday drew a hearty applause (and only a few gasps) from the sparse crowd. He wrapped a piece of fabric around his waist to conceal his genitals, but in the heat of the second truck pull, when he tied the cloth around his testicles only, it was pushed aside to reveal a ball of flesh that looked ready to burst.
And people say I'M stupid! This guy's on a whole 'nother plane of existance.
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