Saturday, October 08, 2005


This highly improbable event would otherwise be buried back in the blog comments, but we found it so smug that we felt it deserved better play.

The anonymous writer (no surprise there) decided that this little blog was too mean to Brian Lewis, associate editorial page editor for the local newspaper. We poked fun at Lewis for writing what may be the Lamest Column Ever.

The response from Mr. Lewis' suck-up friend came Friday night:
Even if Mr. Lewis weren't a better writer, sentence by sentence, than you are--and he certainly is--(reversing "all well and good" to "all good and well" doesn't make it not a cliche, Ron--and how much trouble is it to italicize the name of the paper?), his main claim over you as a writer is his heart for the greater good. What you've got, by contrast, is a hard-on for Ron Davis.

No amount of effort, and you certainly have put in some effort here, can overcome your profound absence of soul. Understanding that, I can see why you'd key on what you perceive as a writer's "laziness." You must be frustrated to see so much of your hard work come to no more than it has.

I remember the column you reference. In it, Mr. Lewis was trying to invite dialogue--asking questions, valuing the opinions of others, trying to make the paper more responsive to the community. I can see how the value of this gesture, and of Mr. Lewis's self-deprecating humor, would fly right by the man who helped bring us Springfield's vanity magazine, and who now self-publishes a blog where he gets to pretend he's a syndicated columnist.

Anonymous, unless you're cultivating a bitchy-head-cheerleader vibe, I wouldn't take your personability cues from Ron, whose idea of being a good person is being seen at Bijan's, sneering knowingly and wearing something hip.

Ron, here's hoping you can come to something better. Come to think of it, a spell of laziness on your part might do us all some good.
So confused. Being seen at Bijans? Sneering knowingly? Wearing something hip? We've got a hard-on? Only one of the four is true.

Bravo, Brian Lewis! Your columns are terrible. But your lackey can turn a phrase.


Anonymous said...

How do you say "fuck you" in a single word?

Acromyms, like FU, are cheating ...

Perhaps he should rad a real nasty blog, like mine ...

And... I will personally only crawl into a hot tub with him that is also occupied by Tom (Hot Tub) Delay.

Incidentally, do you think Delay's new roomie, a guy named "Bruiser" will show him the "HOT" in hot tube at Marion?

Anonymous said...

Oooooo...guess Anonymouse (that is NOT a misspelling) told you, Ron. To the woodshed with you! Obviously doesn't understand the difference between a weekly opinion column in a regional news(cough)paper and a personal blog, which by definition is supposed to be a personal journal. But hey, I guess I'm just pretending to be a syndeecated communist too!

Trust me, I know. I've got a master's science!

Anonymous said...

Well, that was fun.

Anonymous said...

I've always been tickled by the anonymous poster. Do they really think they're being a big hero by taking you to task when they don't even have spine enough to say who they are or what they're about?

They sure don't put a link to their own blog/work so that you can find out do they?

Chicken shit and pathetic. But then, I'm always pissing someone off what with the asshat haberdashery, aren't I?

Anonymous said...

You go guy! Did you notice in today's paper how Leger's column and the other guy;'s were in a smaller type face than the editorials. Too hard for these 56 year old eyes to read. sos