Thursday, November 24, 2005


The other day we ran across a one-sheeter of alleged humor, this one about holiday differences between Democrats and Republicans. Perhaps you've seen it; if so, our sympathy at the insult to your intelligence.
Republicans say "Merry Christmas!"
Democrats say "Happy Holidays!"
Adding insult to injury, the local person peddling this copied tripe was a Democrat. Nothing like proving a stereotype and showing your ass at the same time.

Many Democrats just don't get it. They think identifying "Merry Christmas" with Republicans proves the GOP is narrow and cares only about Christians.

Pardon the blasphemy, but Jesus Christ. What political wizard pulled this from his rectum and proclaimed it sage advice?

The radical right -- current administrators of the Republican Party -- see the words "Merry Christmas" as under assault. They point to imagined slights as proof that Christ is going the way of Montgomery Ward, only without the going-out-of-business sales.

Is it true? Who knows, really? Mass merchandisers are certainly switching over to the generic "happy holidays" greeting, a bow to their increasingly diverse customer base. That rankles many devout Christians who don't bother to appreciate the difference between a person's private beliefs and a company's mission statement.

Hardcore liberals might guffaw about it, but they do so at their own peril in a country where more than eight in 10 adults identify themselves as Christians.

(By the way, a parenthetical aside about the L-word that so many Democrats shun. There is nothing wrong with being a liberal. Most people are liberal; they want clean air and water, sturdy roads and safe streets. They want good schools. They favor reform over more of the same. They're open to new ideas. They care for the least among us. They don't like bigotry. Democrats may be afraid of the word, but only because they let Republicans bastardize it into something ugly. Time to take it back, wear it proudly and quit being afraid.)

You don't have to be Jewish to say "Happy Chanukah." You don't have to be black to wish someone a solid Kwanzaa. Come Dec. 11, you can wish people a glorious Republic Day for Burkina Faso -- and you don't even have to find the place on a map (especially goofy types will wait until Dec. 18, when they can serve yellow cake and honor Niger's Independence Day).

You don't have to be a Christian to say "Merry Christmas." Most Democrats are Christians, just like most Republicans. If someone wishes you "Merry Christmas," be cool. If someone flips you a "Happy Holidays," be cool. At least someone is speaking to you. And Happy Parfait Day Eve.

1 comment:

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