CHARLES NELSON REILLY, 76

Loved him on "Match Game." The New York Times has it this way:

Long before moving west to become what he somewhat ruefully described as a “game show fixture,” Mr. Reilly was an actor and an acting teacher in New York City. In 1962, he won a Tony Award for his portrayal of Bud Frump in the original Broadway production of “How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying.”

But he was proudest of “The Belle of Amherst,” a one-woman play starring Julie Harris based on the life of Emily Dickinson, which he directed on Broadway at the Longacre Theater in 1976, said Timothy Helgeson, who collaborated with him on the show. Two decades later, Mr. Reilly directed Ms. Harris and Charles Durning in a revival of “The Gin Game” at the Lyceum Theater. He was nominated for a Tony for best director in 1997, and Ms. Harris was nominated for best actress.

He was camp long before camp was cool. Cause of death: complications of pneumonia.

DON'T FORGET THE MOB

Joe Labero wants a show in Las Vegas. But the Swedish magician probably won't get his wish -- not after being quoted as saying Vegas is run by "Jewish business syndicates, American dollar millionaires and homosexual booking agents."

According to The Local:

As a prelude to his controversial thesis, Labero explained that he has long been close to getting his own show in Las Vegas.

"But at the end of the day it seems to be impossible -- unless you are a homosexual, a Jew or an American.

"I don't mean to sound prejudiced of course, I'm just cynical. A blond Swedish Viking will have a hard time breaking through the hierarchies that control Vegas, where power rests in the hands of Jewish business syndicates, American dollar millionaires and homosexual booking agents.

"But I will get there, sooner of later," Labero told the magazine Kupé.

Labero is reportedly setting aside his Vegas plans and aiming for the Asian market.

BUSTA BUSTED

The rapper Busta Rhymes has been arrested for drunken driving. According to this New York Times report:

The rapper, whose real name is Trevor Smith, was pulled over about 12:48 a.m. near the corner of West 51st Street and 11th Avenue because the tint on the windows of his 2006 Yukon Denali was too dark, the police said. When officers approached his car and asked for his paperwork, Mr. Smith reached over and dropped his wallet, at which point “he was found to have a strong odor of alcohol on his breath,” according to the police report.

After failing a Breathalyzer test at the scene, he was taken to a police station, where he failed additional sobriety tests, the police said.

Don't expect Rhymes to get a break from cops. They're still angry that Rhymes won't talk with them about the 2006 shooting of his bodyguard, Israel Ramirez. Rhymes was standing next to Ramirez when the shooting took place.

BRANSON SANTAS GO BIG SCREEN

A feature film and reality TV show may be in the offing for a summertime convention of professional Santas, held in Branson.

Variety reports that Nash Entertainment has acquired feature-film rights for "Christmas in July" from Tim Connaghan and the Amalgamated Order of Real Bearded Santas. According to Variety:

The convention, which draws more than 300 professional Kris Kringles, holds sessions on how to correctly ho-ho-ho and how to deal with unruly kids. Proper beard grooming is addressed in another sesh.

"There are no fake beards -- that's a real requirement," Nash said.

Nash and partner Bob Kosberg are producing "Fritz Pollard" with Don Cheadle and "Win My Soul" with Tobey Maguire's production company, according to Variety.

SPIDEY SENSES TINGLING ALL UNDER

"Spider-Man 3" opens Friday on 4,253 theaters in North America. All weekend and into next week everyone's going to be all "spidey" this and "spidey" that, so we thought we'd mention this before the pop-culture tsunami washes us away in a sticky froth of used web.

The film opened in Asia on Tuesday, setting new records in Japan, Korea, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore and the Philippines. Variety reports:

In Hong Kong, Spidey saw the biggest opening day of all time, with $HK7.5 million ($958,984), besting previous record holder "Kung Fu Hustle."

So much hype, so many theaters, so little hope. When The New Yorker uses the word "pitiful" in its review, you know the going will be rough.

TOM POSTON, 85

You know -- George Utley, the clueless guy on "Newhart." Floyd from "Grace Under Fire." A familiar TV face.

According to The Associated Press:

Mr. Poston, who was married to Suzanne Pleshette of "The Bob Newhart Show," died Monday night at home after a brief illness, a family representative, Tanner Gibson, said Tuesday. The nature of his illness was not disclosed.

Bob Newhart remembered Mr. Poston as a "versatile and veteran performer and a kindhearted individual."

"Tom was always the 'go-to guy' on 'Newhart' in addition to being a good and longtime friend," Mr. Newhart said in a statement Tuesday.

Smitty earns the point, with Doc Larry coming in a close second.

DABBS GREER, 90

Character actor. Local, too -- born in Fairview, went to Drury University. He played the Rev. Robert Alden in the TV show "Little House on the Prairie." CBS News reports:

Greer played "everyman" roles, from bus drivers to preachers and shopkeepers, in nearly 100 movies and hundreds of TV show episodes. He played a prison guard in the 1999 movie "The Green Mile."

He played storekeeper Mr. Jonus on "Gunsmoke" and also was the minister who married Mike and Carol Brady in 1969 on TV's "The Brady Bunch."

Most of his work was in supporting roles, but Greer told the Albany, N.Y., Times Union in 2000: "Every character actor, in their own little sphere, is the lead."

He was an extra in "Jesse James," a 1938 movie filmed in Pineville.

Brother Richard, Randy Turner and The Man From Harvard share the point.

TOMMY NEWSOM, 78

Former backup bandleader on "The Tonight Show." Died April 28 in Portsmouth, Va. According to Variety:

Johnny Carson gave Newsom the name Mr. Excitement to make light of his low-key personality and drab brown and blue suits -- a sharp contrast to the flashy style of bandleader Doc Severinsen.

Not long after the Carson era ended in 1992, Newsom remarked that his image as an ordinary guy was "fairly accurate -- compared to Rambo."

Along with his work on "The Tonight Show," Newsom arranged and composed music for Skitch Henderson, Woody Herman, Kenny Rogers, John Denver and other performers.

He got his first horn when he was 8. Did four years with a U.S. Air Force jazz ensemble. Toured with Benny Goodman and played in "The Merv Griffin Show" orchestra. A good life, betcha.

JACK VALENTI, 85

The former aide to Lyndon Johnson, and lobbyist for the motion picture industry, died Thursday. According to The Associated Press, Valenti had a stroke in March. He was hospitalized for several weeks and died of complications.

BOBBY 'BORIS' PICKETT, 69

He did the mash. He did the "Monster Mash." It was a graveyard smash. WNBC reports:

Pickett, dubbed "The Guy Lombardo of Halloween" for his impossibly catchy No. 1 song, passed away Wednesday night at the West Los Angeles Veterans Hospital, said his longtime manager, Stuart Hersh. His daughter, Nancy, and his sister, Lynda, were at Pickett's bedside.

Pickett's multimillion selling single hit the charts three separate times: when it debuted in 1962, again in August 1970, and for a third time in May 1973. ...

While Pickett never again recreated the success of "Monster Mash," he continued performing through his final gig in November 2006. He remained in demand for Halloween performances, including a memorable 1973 show where his bus broke down outside Frankenstein, Mo.

First Boris Yeltsin, now Boris Pickett. Is Boris Badenov next?

DON HO, 76

Entertainer known as "King of Waikiki." Sang "Tiny Bubbles." Died Saturday. The Honolulu Advertiser reports:

He gained prominence while singing at the now-defunct Duke Kahanamoku's in Waikiki from 1964 to 1970. The lounge was a hot spot for local and visiting entertainers, who would stop in to watch Ho perform or join him on stage.

His fame spread to the Mainland after he appeared at the Coconut Grove in Los Angeles in 1966.

His sold-out shows led to appearances at the Sands in Las Vegas, Harrah's at Lake Tahoe and at hot spots in New York and Chicago. He also made guest appearances with Johnny Carson, Joey Bishop and Art Linkletter.

According to The Associated Press, he was born Donald Tai Loy Ho.

TUESDAY BRIEFS

•The Tennessee home that once belonged to Johnny Cash has burned to the ground. The BBC reports that the lakeside home -- where Cash and his wife, June Carter Cash, lived from 1968 until their deaths in 2003 -- burned Tuesday "while renovations were being carried out for its new owner, Bee Gee Barry Gibb." Music-video fans will remember the home's interior, used for Cash's 2002 hit, "Hurt." It may be a Nine Inch Nails original, but that Cash vid gets to us every time.

•Thank God It's Over, For Now: Larry Birkhead is the father of Anna Nicole Smith's daughter. Howard K. Stern, Smith's attorney, now fades into obscurity (a girl can hope, can't she?). Dannielynn is the heir to Smith's earthly possessions -- that is, unless her 6-year-old son (and his father) can lay a credible claim.

•Wall of Witnesses: At his upcoming murder trial, music producer Phil Spector will watch several women testify that he brandished guns around them. Tuesday, a judge ruled that Spector's ex-girlfriend can testify the producer held a gun to her forehead and threatened to shoot her if she left his mansion. The judge had already OK'd testimony from four other women who said Spector was all about waving guns around and acting like a potentially homicidal maniac. Spector, 67, is charged with murder in the shooting death of Lana Clarkson, shot in the head in the foyer of Spector's L.A. home in 2003.

BOB CLARK, 66

Strannix @ Welcome to the Revolution earns the point. Clark was director of A Christmas Story, Porky's and Rhinestone.

Mmm. Porky's.

Clark and his 22-year-old son died Wednesday after their sedan was hit by a GMC Yukon. According to TMZ:

Hector Velazquez Nava, 24, was charged with two counts of gross vehicular manslaughter while intoxicated; one for each of the victims, and he's being held in a Los Angeles County jail in lieu of $200,000 bail. If convicted, Nava faces up to twelve years in prison.

Strannix tips a half-point to Skippy the Bush Kangaroo for the find.

FOUR QUICK BULLETS

•This is why we love Arkansas and its natural resource of dumb crooks with three names.

•This is why we are grateful that Kurt Cobain, though our hero, is dead.

•This is why Tara Reid should stay inside.

•This is why cartoons shouldn't get big-screen treatment. John Goodman as Pops Racer, father of Speed? As directed by Larry and Andy Wachowski? Yeesh.

LIKE A NAZI, ONLY WORSE

Mia Farrow and her son, Ronan, have probably decided that she will never work in Hollywood again. Nothing else explains a column this week in the Wall Street Journal (subscribers only, sorry).

In the column, Farrow and her son criticize the 2008 Olympics as a massive hypocrisy, with corporate sponsors ignoring China's terrible record on human rights. Fair enough. But then they compare Steven Spielberg with Leni Riefenstahl, a wickedly talented director and Nazi propagandist:

[D]isappointing is the decision of artists like director Steven Spielberg -- who quietly visited China this month as he prepares to help stage the Olympic ceremonies -- to sanitize Beijing's image.

Is Mr. Spielberg, who in 1994 founded the Shoah Foundation to record the testimony of survivors of the Holocaust, aware that China is bankrolling Darfur's genocide?

Does Mr. Spielberg really want to go down in history as the Leni Riefenstahl of the Beijing Games?"

The Jewish director of "Schindler's List" is just like a Nazi. Um-hmm.

LIKE A COUNTRY SONG, ONLY SICKER

The husband of singer Wynonna Judd has been arrested on child-sex charges. The Voice of America reports:

Judd has filed for divorce from her husband, Dan R. Roach, after his arrest on charges involving sex with a minor.

The action follows Roach's arrest last week in Abilene, Texas. He faces three charges of aggravated battery against a child younger than 13. Police expect him to be extradited to Nashville, Tennessee, where the incidents allegedly took place.

Posting in a statement on her web site, Wynonna Judd says she is "devastated" by the arrest.

The couple were married in November, 2003. Roach, her former bodyguard and road manager, has for the past month been receiving treatment for drug and alcohol addiction in a rehabilitation clinic in Texas.

Wynonna Judd, 42, has sold nearly 30 million albums as a solo artist. She also sang with her mother Naomi in the country duo The Judds, and is the half-sister of actress Ashley Judd.

Bail for the aptly named Roach is $750,000.

ONLY ROCK AND ROLL

The wife of rock singer Scott Weiland -- he of Velvet Revolver and Stone Temple Pilots -- has been busted for torching his clothes. This follows a weekend brawl between the lovely couple at a fab hotel. According to this Associated Press report:

Mary Weiland, 31, was booked for investigation of felony arson vandalism after officers responded to a call Saturday night that a female was burning clothes. They found a trash can full of smoldering clothes, Sgt. Mathew Ferguson said.

Officers called Weiland, who said the wardrobe was worth $10,000, Ferguson said. The couple's children, ages 4 and 6, were placed in the custody of family friends.

The arrest culminated a rowdy weekend for Weiland and his wife.

Police were called to the nearby boutique Graciela Hotel on Pass Avenue earlier Saturday after the couple got into an argument that left two rooms vandalized, Ferguson said.

"Both rooms had damage and items scattered, broken plates and things. It was looking definitely like items were deliberately destroyed," Ferguson said. He said the amount of damage exceeded $400.

We long for the days when Weiland was simply strung out on heroin.

EAT, DRINK, NO MERRY

Even when stressed, humans do not eat their young. It's a literal distinction, sure, but it still separates us from invertebrates and the occasional hamster.

Figuratively, however, we're cannibals, smacking our lips and relishing the squirt of saliva that presages a fine meal of meat. Any claim of disgust is flimsy, and made between bites and swallows.

•Sunday night on "60 Minutes," Katie Couric interviewed John and Elizabeth Edwards. Couric didn't shy from asking questions that most Americans had inside their heads. This makes her evil in the minds of some Democrats, and now they rant about Couric being an agent for the GOP (never mind that the same Dems thought Couric was aces when she laced into George H.W. Bush during a 1992 interview -- the meat on Couric's bones is too toothsome to decline, and it masks the taste of hypocrisy).

•Anna Nicole Smith's remains make for great leftovers. On Monday a medical examiner in Florida announced that Smith died from gobbling too many legal drugs, including chloral hydrate. The autopsy report also revealed that Smith's body boasted several tattoos, including:

•A pair of red lips in the right lower abdominal quadrant.
•Two red cherries on the right mid pelvis.
•A Playboy Bunny on the left anterior mid pelvis.
•The words "Daniel" and "Papas" on the mid anterior pelvis.
•A "mixed tattoo" on the right lower left and ankle included "Christ's head, Our Lady of Guadalupe, the Holy Bible, the naked torso of a woman, the smiling face of Marilyn Monroe, a cross (and) a heart and shooting flames."

Christ and Marilyn in the same tattoo. Tasty, this entree.

•Dessert is also a meat dish, made of flesh from the newspaper industry. According to this New York Times report, paragraph factories are dying, with February ad revenues below the typically dismal January report. Said one industry analyst:

“There is absolutely no question that the next 10 years are going to be really bad for the newspaper business. This is a time of wrenching change and chaos. All of our assumptions about newspapers are going to be changed. The format, the business model, the organization of newspapers have outlived their usefulness.”

Now gorged and suddenly anxious, we must purge to make room for the benzodiazepines. And the next meal of meat.

CALVERT DEFOREST, 85

Smitty gets the point for Larry Bud Melman, who died Monday in Long Island. Damn. TV Week reports:

"It was the greatest thing that had happened in my life," he said of the character. But because the Melman moniker was considered NBC's intellectual property, Mr. DeForest appeared under his own name on "Late Show With David Letterman" after it debuted on CBS in 1993.

His last appearance on "The Late Show" was in 2002, to celebrate his 81st birthday.

Letterman issued a statement that said, in part: "Everyone always wondered if Calvert was an actor playing a character, but in reality he was just himself -- a genuine, modest and nice man."

LUTHER INGRAM, 69

Brother Robert gets the point for a 4:32 a.m. alert. Brother Richard also flags us, but at an hour when people are actually awake.

Ingram is best known for a monster hit song, "If Loving You Is Wrong (I Don't Want to Be Right)." The Associated Press reports:

Ingram died Monday at a Belleville, Illinois, hospital of heart failure, friend and journalist Bernie Hayes said Tuesday. He had suffered for years from diabetes, kidney disease and partial blindness, his wife, Jacqui Ingram, said.

Ingram performed with Ike Turner at clubs in East St. Louis, roomed with Jimi Hendrix in New York and was the opening act for Isaac Hayes. He recorded through the 1980s and performed in concert until the mid-1990s, when his health began declining.

"His instrument was his voice; his heart and head were his inspiration," said Hayes, a St. Louis journalist, disc jockey and author of "The Death of Black Radio."

Another great from Ingram's pen included "Respect Yourself," co-written with Sir Mack Rice.